vulgar genital-injury metaphors and bad tech
And then you're in the hardware store five minutes before closing time marching angry down the aisles with the wood slapping your thighs, where even is it, where's the I-dun-goofed-and-gotta-fix-in-a-hurry aisle, toilet repair, nope, quickset drywall repair nah, you end up having to ask where the dick-releasing crowbars are and the lady just can't keep the snicker off her lips can she, so much for my fucking Saturday night